The ‘Labyrinth’ Live-Tweet

On November 16, Kevin was joined by @AronDej and @StellarReviews to live-tweet the Jim Henson fantasy flick Labyrinth. Here’s a log, complete with time-code for your home-viewing pleasure.

     

Editor’s Note: While Kevin calls this film a turkey, he acknowledges that Labyrinth isn’t a full-on turkey but more a victim of its own era.

Turkey #6 is… “Labyrinth,” the Henson Creature Shop sort-of musical with glam rock! #kevincarrtweetsturkeys #labyrinthtweet

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 00:30 – Dig the cheesy synth music

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:10 Loving the wonderful music.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 01:30 – This computer generated owl was really sweet… back in the 80s.

AronDej: LABYRINTH 1:20 – First Bowie song of the movie!

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:40 – Too much protection from the 80s? Awesome.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 02:25 – Terry Jones wrote the screenplay? The Monty Python Terry Jones?

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 2:46 – I’m spoiled by movies starting right away.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 03:15 – Wow. A teenage Jennifer Connelly… before she got huge boobs… and then lost a ton of weight.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 04:00 – The 80s… when saxaphones were good for any song.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 4:07 still loving the music. Blast from the past should be next.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 4:51 – Aww dogs were not allowed in the house, back in the day.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 05:35 – You should have dates. You’re Jennifer Freaking Connelly, after all.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 05:54 -Oh shit! That thing just scared the crap out of me.

AronDej: LABYRINTH 6:00 I actually really like this scene.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 6:28 – Playing dress up as an over dramatic teen.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 07:15 – Jim Henson: He’s best directing muppets.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 07:45 – Where’s Waldo?

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 7:50 Over dramatic teen queen staring at herself in the mirror. Still happens to this day.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 8:17 She did housework?

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 08:55 – Is that Salacious Crumb?

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 8:55 Those goblins are kind of creepy.

AronDej: LABYRINTH 9:00 My sister used to chant this when I was a baby. Not joking.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 09:25 – This is one giant PSA about shaken baby syndrome.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 9:35 I wish… I wish… I wish you’d say it already.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 10:00 – Oh shit. She said it.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 10:05 Evil selfish teens. Got your wish, be happy! Nothing’s every good enough.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – * make that ever good enough

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 11:05 – There’s a goblin touching itself in the crib.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 11:10 pulling back the blanket never makes anyone reappear. Or maybe it does, let’s find out!

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 12:00 – Enter the glam rock Goblin King with biiiiiiiiig hair.

AronDej: LABYRINTH 12:00 BOWIE!!! He gave me nightmares as a child because of this movie!

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 12:33 – NOW I want the David Bowie Wig. That’s HOTT. 20 years ago.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 13:15 – I think this has the same background soundtrack as FRIGHT NIGHT.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – Fake tears are almost convincing, sometimes.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 13:50 – Crap! I don’t remember that being in our back yard!

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 14:10 Don’t you understand I was just kidding while I was screaming?

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 15:10 – Here’s the guy responsible for all the yellow snow around the neighborhood.

AronDej: LABYRINTH 15:10 You know, for kids!

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 15:02 Excuse me, I know you can help me, so do it. If not the story would end right now!

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 16:38 You can’t ask for the door, but let me show you… The door.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 17:15 – Do you think she might find a frozen Jack Nicholson in there?

AronDej: LABYRINTH Sarah seems so nice here… too bad she changed her name, moved to NYC, became a crack whore, and started dating Jared Leto.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 17:58 Thanks for nothing. Especially not showing me the door!

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 18:00 – Did she just call him Hogwart? J.K. Rowlings must have watched this (and Charles Band’s TROLL).

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 18:38 Yay for more 80s music.

AronDej: LABYRINTH 18:00 Hog-wart? Wonder of J.K. got that from this.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 19:17 Oops, gotta give up for a few seconds. Make it more dramatic.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 19:40 – Bouncy bouncy. (I know… I’m a perv)

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – #20:04 Running for 20 seconds shouldn’t make you freak out like a drama queen. Oh, wait.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 20;25 – A magic caterpillar? Shouldn’t you be smoking a bong or somthing?

AronDej: LABYRINTH 19:45 – Ah! I must keep running! I have to find out where this dated 80s synth score is coming from and press STOP!

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 20:30 Great, another talking … Weirdo to help me.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 21:40 Thank you! I will be polite and thankful for about 2.5 seconds.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 22:00 – This girl is pretty casual about talking to magical creatures. Maybe she has a brain tumor.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 22:32 Toby is handling it better then his older sister.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 22:55 More David singing.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 23:05 – They didn’t even try to make this song make sense in the movie. Sure it’s cool, but damn!

AronDej: LABYRINTH 22:30 – LET THE WILD RUMPUS STA… Er, wrong movie.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 23:21 That is the perfect Halloween outfit!

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 24:00 – There is waaaaaay too much of David Bowie’s package in this movie. It’s like an inverse camel-toe.

AronDej: LABYRINTH 24:00 – I love this dance number! So fun and dated! But.. oh god… not… not bowie bulge! ITS CALL COMING BACK!! HELP!!!

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 27:00 – Statler and Wladorf have seen better days.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 26:54 She doesn’t think it’s fair someone changes her marks, but it’s okay that her brother is gone.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 27:40 – yeah, don’t ask the crotch twins. Ask the guys at the top of the shield instead.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 28:05 Let’s trust more creepy things.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 29:00 – This scene gave me nightmares as a kid.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 28:50 If she has to think she’s getting smarter, she may need more help then she realizes.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 29:23 Hands are creepy.

AronDej: LABYRINTH 29:10 – Now this is just fucked up.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 29:35 Since I’m pointed that way I guess I’ll go down? What kind of movie is this???

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 29:50 – Thank you for a massive groping of a sixteen-year-old Jennifer Connelly.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 30:30 Who’s there? Me? Oh it’s you! No doors this time.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 31:23 She’s turned 3 corners so she’s too far to give up now.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 32:00 – This movie is doing nothing to teach teenager girls how not to get molested by midgets.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 32:00 You can bribe a goblin with jewelry! I’ll have to remember that.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 33:04 – He lied. He said there were no doors. Midgets, I swear!

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 33:30 – Never mind the giant stones telling you to stay away.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 34:15 – Proof that David Bowie has so much balls that it doesn’t all fit in his pants.

AronDej: LABYRINTH 34:27 – NO! NO! STOP IT! This traumatized me as a child!

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 35:47 David Bowie can throw! Who knew?

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 36:00 – When zambonis attack!

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 37:10 Now let’s question the trustworthy goblin.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 37:37 The Eternal Stench would scare me too.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 37:30 – ‘If you smelt the bog of eternal stench”… I’m climbing with my face in your ass… It’s a close second.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 38:38 Two can play the cheating game.

AronDej: LABYRINTH 38:30-ish – If you want jewels, I’m pretty sure Bowie’s got plenty to go around.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 38:37 WOAH Something else as tall as the drama queen.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 39:40 – “Oh! A young girl!” Erm… yeah, that guy’s a little creepy.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 39:55 – “‘sallright!”

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – I love the double negatives and perfect English.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 41:40 The high pitched screams of a teen girl

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 42:00 – As John Peters once told @ThatKevinSmith… every film needs a Chewbacca.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 42:40 They can’t actually show her throwing… Because she can’t.

AronDej: LABYRINTH 42:22 – Oh look! I didn’t know Rosie O’Donnell was in this movie!

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 44:25 Big Monsters always cower.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 45:31 There’s something in my mouth.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 47:22 Promoting drinking while babysitting is a no no.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 48:15 – Sarah should learn to stop declaring that everything’s okay. That’s when shit happens.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 49:30 – “I just noticed your lovely jewels are missing.” Well, everyone in the audience has been seeing your jewels popping.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 49:51 Wait. I need you to hold my ball.

AronDej: LABYRINTH 49:43 – Ugh. More bulge…

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 50:24 “Close up shot of my balls.”

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 51:10 – We haven’t had a song in a while. Let’s just throw one in with no explanation.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 51:25 Who wrote these lyrics?

AronDej: LABYRINTH 51:04 – Big Bird on crack… and in a Neo-Soul Synth group.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 52:00 – No expensive blue-screen here. Just film compositing on black mattes. #iknowtoomuchaboutfilmmaking

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – Okay now is when the drugs should have kicked in from the beginning.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 53:40 – These creatures inspired Muddflaps & Skidz from TRANSFORMERS 2.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 53:49 We lost our head.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 54:19 Did you get your head? Mine’s still msising.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 54:44 Mythical heads can fly, they can do anything.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 55:10 OMG! It’s BUBBLES!

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 55:15 – Who did the sound design for this movie? Because the farts and burp noises are awesome.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 55:35 – And thanks for the giant anus in the middle of the bog. Seriously? This is PG?

AronDej: LABYRINTH 55:15 – The bog of eternal stench… it sounds like a 45 year old man with indigestion.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 56:30 – Convenience Theater presetns the return of Ludo.

AronDej: LABYRINTH 56:40 – Are you sure it wasn’t just Ludo making those noises?

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 57:30 – Is that a fantastic Mr. Fox?

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 57:50 There is always a Captain Obvious in every movie. Smells bad.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – Yes, this was definitely meant for people on drugs.

AronDej: LABYRINTH 58:15 – Can you imagine not only being on this set, but with these creatures AND thd backgrounded noises for TBOES?

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:00:15 Well that was easy.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:01:16 Rolling the rock IN the Stench would have the STENCH on it. I’m confused.

AronDej: LABYRINTH 1:01:00 0 This is just completely bizarre. Even in the context of the movie.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:02:25 The dog ran… HAHA. Funniest part of the whole movie. How sad.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 1:03:10 – There you go, folks… Eight full minutes of fart noises. I should show this to my kids.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 1:04:20 – Did Hoggle just say, “Damn you, Jerrod?” Waht’s not to love about $5 foot longs?

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:04:30 More Dancing… More Bowie singing too?

AronDej: LABYRINTH 1:04:45 – My favorite song of the movie is now starting.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:04:49 Well at least Bowie has more balls now.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 1:05:00 – David Bowie’s holding 4 balls… yet he still has a hell of a bulge in his pants, I’m sure.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:06:12 Wow she changed and everything to go dancing.

AronDej: LABYRINTH 1:06:23 – Well, now its starting.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:06:41, Well that’s kinda creepy. Even for David Bowie.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 1:06:50 – David Bowie looks more comfortable in make-up than Jennifer Connelly does.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 1:07:40 – This scene is a period piece costume drama set away from ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – Looking aimlessly around never actually works.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – I mean he is.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 1:08:20 – Bowie should have put down the bedazzler long before he finished that coat. It’s a bit much.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:08:50 GHB anyone?

AronDej: LABYRINTH 1:09:00 – Wait, how old was Jennifer Connelly in this movie? Oh, yeah, 16. Wow.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 1:09:25 – People in glass houses shouldn’t throw chairs.

AronDej: LABYRINTH 1:09:35-ish – I actually really like this scene.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:10:07 Waking up in trash = Not a good trip.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 1:11:00 – This is what the Olsen twins will look like in about 25 years.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:10:57 Hugging a teddy bear reminds us you are 16 after your night out with Bowie.

AronDej: LABYRINTH 1:10:55 – Looks like the crazy homeless lady downtown. Or better yet, the crazy cat lady from The Simpsons.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:12:12 Enter crack trash lady.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:13:13 I was looking for something, but, we’re in a poinless scene right now so it’s okay.

AronDej: LABYRINTH 1:13:00ish – She’s turning her into a hoarder like her.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:14:00 Oh, I remember now. Something about Toby.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – *whew* forgot the point of the movie for a moment.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 1:14:20 – Does anyone else think that Arnold did the uncredited voice of Ludo?

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:14:47 I’ll let you bang on the door while I whisper not to.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:15:50 More 80s music. Best part of the movie!

AronDej: LABYRINTH – 1:16:20 Now that’s actually pretty cool.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:15:25 is the dog a horse? I missed that one.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 1:17:00 – Aw, don’t lose your head.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 1:19:05 – That kinda looks like Diagon Alley.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:19:45 Definitely do something.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 1:21:05 – Some of those chickens are totally unfazed by this chase scene. They’re either drugged or dead.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:31:24 Food is always the way to get what you want.

AronDej: LABYRINTH 1:21:55 – HOLY SHIT. Baby statue with huge penis.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 1:21:50 – Did you see where the faucet comes out of the statue? Yes, exactly where you think.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:22:10 Is the Goblin or the dog growling? HAHA nice hit.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 1;22:55 – And Ludo takes out a goblin with his massive badonkadonk.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 1;23:55 – She just said, “Hi-ya!” Is that an homage to Miss Piggy?

AronDej: LABYRINTH 1:23:30-ish – JESUS! This fight is freaking violent!

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:24:15 Yay Critters!

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:26:22 The dog is still a horse.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 1:26:00 – Say hello to my little friend!

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 1:26:55 – I want a clock that reads 13 o’clock.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:27:05 But why? That’s the way it’s done. Ok. Thanks Bye.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 1:27:35 – Coolest. Set design. Ever.

AronDej: LABYRINTH 1:27:30-ish Awesome. MC Escher is the man! And I like this set a lot.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:28:06 Creepy again.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 1:27:35 – Coolest. Set design. Ever.

AronDej: LABYRINTH 1:27:30-ish Awesome. MC Escher is the man! And I like this set a lot.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:28:06 Creepy again.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:29— Of course you can’t be in her David. She’s 16.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 1:30:35 – She really misjudged the height of that jump.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:30:30 Why can’t everyone fall like that?

AronDej: LABYRINTH 1:30:45 – What the…

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 1:31:00 – David Bowie changes his costume again, yet we still get to see the outline of his junk.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:29:57 Holy Bat Balls!

AronDej: LABYRINTH 1:31:01 – Ugh… please! STOP!

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 1;31:55 – Stop! Hammer time!

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:31:45 I may just have nightmares about this.

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:32:28 Fear me… Love me… I’m creepy.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 1:34:15 – How is that kid sleeping with all those lights on?

StellarReviews: LABYRINTH – 1:34:51 Is she home? No she left the baby there by himself.

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 1:35:50 – Her parents are going to freak out when they come upstairs and sees the goblin party going on in her room.

AronDej: LABYRINTH – 1:36:00 – That’s right… now get on your knees & have double ended dildo mutual masbturbation so you can get those drugs!

kevincarr: LABYRINTH 1:36:50 – And ROLL CREDITS!

Thanks to @AronDej and StellarReviews for joining in on a late-night live-tweet.

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